Daddy To The Rescue

Bobby seems to understand the seasons and they bring order to his life.  The leaves change, it gets colder, the Christmas tree comes out, the snow comes, and then it gets warmer.  When the sun shines longer and the temperatures rise, Bobby starts climbing the deck staircase and stands in front of the locked gate and looks out over the covered swimming pool.  Let me tell you, it drives him crazy.  He wants IN THE POOL!!!  He walks around he pool and tries to peek under the pool cover and when he lifts the cover a little, it lets light into the water.  That is the worst thing that you can do for the pool water, let in light....that's when bad things start to happen to the water.  That being said, it causes us to open our pool way before most people in our region.

Daddy looked at the forecast and we were finally going to have a good forecast week.  He took vacation from work and started working on opening the pool.  The first thing on the agenda for the pool this year....new pool steps.  The old ones had seen better days so Daddy shopped around online and ordered some wedding cake stairs so that Bobby would have more stair room because he spends a great deal of time sitting on the stairs in the water.  When Bobby got home and saw what Daddy was building, he was super excited!!

Then Daddy added one more step to the stair case and Bobby was even more excited.  The stairs were finally put into the pool and Bobby just could not stand it, he HAD to get in....he just didn't care how extremely cold the water was!

 You know that it's cold when you can't even put your arms down.

He didn't stay in long, but did get in the next day as soon as he got home from school, thankfully the temperatures were in the high 80s and Daddy had the solar heater hooked up and the water was a little warmer.  Bobby actually stayed in the water for almost 1/2 an hour.  Bring on the summer!!!

Daddy had a great idea for the old pool steps.......

He found some wood scraps in the garage and made a much needed staircase for the trampoline.

Daddy is the one responsible for Bobby's personal playground.  When Bobby was 2, we got him a swingset for his birthday which Daddy put together himself.  Last summer Daddy built Bobby a platform swing for his swingset because he loved the platform swing that he used in occupational therapy.  A couple of evenings ago, Bobby used his platform swing all evening.

A couple of years ago when it was clear how much Bobby loved the water features at our local pool, Daddy built Bobby a waterfall of his very own in our above ground pool.

Not sure what we would do without Daddy making Bobby's World just a better place to be!!!!!!

Winter Getaway, Bobby Style

"At the beach" is Bobby's new mantra, meaning let's get the heck out of this winter soaked place and find shelter on a warm, sunny beach.  Mommy and Daddy totally get it Bobby, but we just can't go to the beach right now.  We have been feeling super bad for him and looked up a couple of different ideas for weekend getaways.  When we really thought it through, if we were going to be able to relax at all while Bobby was having fun, a hotel with an indoor pool was our best option.

When we plan any type of night away with Bobby all types of issues arise with the biggest issue being his safety.  What kind of safety items are we going to have to take with us to make sure that Bobby doesn't escape from the room?  So it made even more sense for our relaxing swimming weekend to happen in our own town so that we could go home at night and Bobby could sleep in his own bed where the safety bells and whistles are firmly in place.  Yes, our autism friendly getaway happened in a hotel close to home.

We knew that Bobby was going to love the swimming aspect, but never dreamed how much he would love the hotel room.  He ran around the room laughing and squealing before he stripped off his clothes and got into one of the beds and snuggled up in the covers.  Daddy and I were stunned!!

 Score, he got to watch Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune from his hotel bed!!!

Then Bobby decided to call for some "entertainment."

When Mommy and Daddy said no to his entertainment, he had no choice but to use the internet!! Ah, Elmo, that's more like it....you really know what I like!!!

He swam for a little while on Friday evening but most of our time was spent just enjoying the room. We went home and slept and went back over first thing Saturday morning.  He swam all day Saturday!!!!

 His favorite spot in the pool was in front of a light that was in the 3 foot water.  He spent a great deal of time parked out in front of this light, it makes it look like he was swimming in the dark in the pictures.

 He would get out of the water, run to the deep end, jump in, bob up and down for a little while, swim to the light and park himself there for a while longer.  Mommy and Daddy got to hang out in the lounge chairs!!!  Perfect!!!

 Dead man float!!

What does an autism family do when they have access to a local indoor pool????  Obviously you call your other autism family friends and invite them over for some swimming.  After this long, hard winter we all need some swimming fun.  Sonny and Joey came over and we all went to Burger King for some lunch and we let them play in the play area before we came back for some swimming.

 Joey hanging out in a lounge chair for a couple of minutes.....

 Sonny was hanging out in the hot tub and decided to use the foam to make a Santa beard!!

 Hot tub fun....

 Look, the brothers are getting along!!

Next on our swimming playdate agenda, Miss Natalie......

 Look at that smile on her face!!!

The kids all had fun, the adults got to hang out in the lounge chairs with free wifi.  I didn't have to cook any meals.  A good time was had by all!!!

Now it's time to get back to our normal winter routine.....watching it snow and guessing how many inches of the white stuff we are going to get in this new snowstorm.  I'm hoping for just a dusting and praying it is not a foot!!!

Autism Birthday Parties Aplenty

When your child is on the more severe end of the autism spectrum, social engagement invitations are not overflowing in your mailbox.  Which, quite frankly, is just fine with me.  When he was in Pre-K we got many of the obligatory invitations in which they must invite every child in their class to a party if they invite anyone.  Me chasing after him and trying to get him to interact in any birthday party activities that he could have cared less about while strangers are watching and he is just getting more overwhelmed with the loudness of the amount of children running around...well just sounds like a super fun time for all involved!!

However, we have a great group of families that we met starting four or five years ago through our support group that have become great friends.  Getting invitations to their kids birthday parties are like a big score....autism friendly birthday parties ROCK, at least for Bobby and his peers!!

Somehow, Bobby ended up with invitations to birthday parties for the past four weeks in a row.  I know, he is turning into quite the social butterfly.  Even though they are autism friendly parties, there are still some struggles that are unique to each special needs child that attends.

Our first birthday party of the month was not for a child with autism, but for the younger sibling of a child with autism who has had all these "quirky" children hanging around him all of his life.  He is used to them, like it or not.  When his mother invited Bobby to his party, I decided that we would only come to the second half of the party.  To another autism mom, this is totally normal and OK, no explanation needed.

Why wasn't I taking him to the entire party?  He had been to this particular facility numerous times and I was 100% sure that Bobby would be throwing a fit until he got to the swimming pool since he knew that it was there.  He would not have played nicely in the gym area and could care less about basketball.  He also doesn't care to sit and watch someone open their presents and eat cake.  Nope, all he would want would be SWIMMING!!!!

I was right, as soon as I pulled into the parking lot he started, "in the pool...in the pool...in the pool." He got out of the car and walked nicely with me to the building and he was stripping his shirt off the closer that we got so that he could be ready as soon as we opened the door.

The aspect of this birthday party that was the easiest.....buying a present for the birthday boy.  After all, this was for a typical child who likes to play with toys.  This was a breeze.  A new soccer ball, nerf ball, frisbee and I know that he will use them and wear them out.  Bobby played happily, by himself, in the pool while there were other kids running around from the pool to the hot tub to the pool mostly playing together.  Bobby had a GREAT time!!!

The following week's birthday party was for a girl who is also on the autism spectrum.  Historically, she has not wanted to open any presents or participate in a typical birthday party, very similar to Bobby.  Her mom decided to have a small party at a local park that is on her, as well as Bobby's, list of acceptable places to play.  The party was scheduled for right after school because there would be the best chance that the park would be empty while most people are getting home from school and having dinner before getting out for the evening to play.  One of the other invited guests ended up being sick, so the party list ended up being Bobby and the birthday girl, which was PERFECT for both children involved.

As moms in this specific situation, we often wonder what to do...celebrate or not celebrate?!  Is it for the kids or for the moms?  But, I'm pretty sure that you could ask this question over many other kids birthday parties today.  However, this case isn't the same thing.  This isn't a mom trying to out do another mom, this is just a mom trying to make her child's birthday special.  This definitely was not in the mommy handbook that we read while we were pregnant...what to do if your special needs child does not want to celebrate anything.  We instead have to look to our fellow special needs families and our children's behavioral therapists.  Yes, we sometimes even have to add "opening a present" to their behavioral programs....yes, we have to teach some of our children how to open a present.  If we don't bother with these things when they are young, they may never get it.  So we soldier on and try to plan a zero stress party for our children and hope beyond all hope that it is at least a little successful and that we don't end up going home after the party and cry our eyes out because our child hated every second of the party that was planned in their honor.

I am so pleased to announce that the party was a huge success!!!  The birthday girl and Bobby both had fun!!  No tears shed, no fits thrown....just a small intimate party for the two of them and a third guest that included a little boy that was almost 3, who came to play at the park, that had a super fun time.

As for a gift for the birthday girl, books were the obvious option.  She picks out a book from her collection every day and carries that one book around with her all day long.  I picked out a few that I thought that she might like and put them into a gift bag so that she could look in and not have to unwrap anything.  Her mom told me later that I scored with the Baby Einstein Halloween book that I picked out.  Even better news, she opened wrapped gifts on her actual birthday without any fits!! Whoo Hoo!!

The birthday party for the following week was for one of our support group kids that has Fragile X Syndrome, which is on the autism spectrum.  Bobby really enjoyed his birthday party last year because it was at a gymnastics center and they got to jump on trampolines for two hours.  This year the party was at an outdoor retreat area.  The scheduled activities included a bonfire to make s'mores, a hayride, pumpkin painting, playground area and food.  I wasn't sure how well Bobby would do at the party, but I knew that he would love the hour long ride to get to the party.  The fact that the trees were in full color was just an added bonus for the drive.

When I parked the car he could hardly wait for me to open the door.  There was a pond and Bobby was in heaven.  He went right over and parked himself in the grass with Mommy right beside him.

He kept sliding down closer and closer to the water and trying to get in and I would have to verbally prompt him back to sit beside me.  We did this for almost an hour.  One of my autism mom friends came over and sat with us to talk.  Bobby never went over to the birthday boy to say "Happy Birthday" or "thanks for inviting me" or any of those social requirements and the birthday boy didn't expect them or come over and say "thanks for coming to my party" or any of those social requirements.  This is what I really love about taking Bobby to autism kid birthday parties, social norms are pretty much thrown out the door....how much they are thrown out depends on the functioning level of the child and how much the parents are using the time as a teaching lesson.  Kids that are higher functioning will be working on these behaviors much more.

Then the parents announced that the hay ride would be starting soon.  I didn't know whether or not Bobby would like the hay ride or if I was going to try and then I realized that this was the perfect place to try.  If I needed to stop the hay ride to get him off, everyone there would completely understand.  I asked him if he wanted to go on a hay ride and I got zero response.  Then I changed my approach to something that he knew, "Do you want to go mow grass?"  He jumped right up and walked over to the tractor.  He was about ready to climb on the tractor drivers' lap, so I redirected him to the back.  The result....he LOVED the hay ride.  We stayed on and took the second trip too. Each hay ride was fairly long, 15-20 minutes long and Bobby was calm and happy for both rides.

This party was perfect for Bobby, and the birthday boy, a couple of hours spent enjoying nature. They didn't have to join in games.  There were activities set up if they wanted to participate or even if you wanted to take it home to complete.  But there is was no pressure put on the kids to do anything unless they wanted to.  It was so much fun to watch Bobby be so happy at a brand new place.

I knew that he would enjoy the final birthday party of the month.  Why?  This party is an annual tradition.  The birthday boy likes the same party every year....a swimming party.  Every October for the past 4 or 5 years, we have been going to a swimming birthday party for one of the boys that we met through our support group.

One great thing about this being the same each year, the kids know exactly what to expect...swimming, just swimming.  No games, no prizes, no food or drinks....just swimming.  Get in and have fun kids!!!  This was also an exciting year, because NONE of the parents from our support group had to get into the water with the kids.  They are all full fledged swimmers!!!  Yay kids!!

One particular reason that there is no cake at this child's party....he can't stand to hear the song "Happy Birthday."  For some unknown reason, the song upsets him tremendously and it takes him quite a while to get himself calmed down.  A super fun problem when you go to a restaurant because you just NEVER know when they are going to bring out a cake and start singing to a guest.  It is also fun to explain this to someone who just does not understand autism.

To all of my autism friends that invited Bobby to their child's birthday parties....Thank You!!  I can honestly say, he had a GREAT time!!!!

The (Almost) Perfect Day

I like to plan things out.  There, I said it.  But I couldn't make definite plans for Tuesday until I woke up and looked at the hourly forecast for the morning.  Bobby did his best to help me check the morning forecast much earlier than I would have preferred.  This is why "(almost)" is in the title.  Bobby woke up at 2:00 am.  Amazingly the forecasted rain was going to hold off for the morning.

He fell back to sleep on the couch hours later, but started waking at 7:45.  I got him up, made him toast, brushed teeth, wet down his hair, got him dressed and 20 minutes later we were getting in the car to go to the bus stop.  I contemplated keeping him home, especially since we were picking him up from school less than an hour after the school day started.  But..........Bobby LOVES riding the school bus.  Grandma Carolyn had spent the night and rode to the bus stop with us.  While I was getting Bobby on the bus, she got out and took a picture....

My mom and I went back home and got a big surprise ready for Bobby.  We both had breakfast, got dressed and packed pool bags to get ready for Bobby's favorite place.

I think that he was surprised when we showed up in his classroom so early to pick him up, but he definitely didn't complain.  "French fries?"  No Bobby.  We got in the car and saw the beach towels and pool bag.  Me:  "Do you want to go see Coach Lorri?"  Bobby:  "Coach Lorri....Coach Lorri....Coach Lorri"  Yes, this means he knows where we are going...Krepps Pool for adaptive swimming!!!

Who is Coach Lorri?  Well, thanks for asking.  She is Bobby's Adaptive PE teacher.  She works with special needs kids in Mon. Co. schools and helps them learn how to catch, throw, dribble, swing a bat and other fun, active skills.  More importantly to Bobby, she manages Krepps Pool over the summer.  Coach has been working with Bobby since he started school when he was 3 years old and he had a couple of rough years where he wasn't exactly thrilled to go off and work with her.  Actually, getting him to walk into the gymnasium was a struggle for years.  Thankfully he has gotten over the most challenging struggles with PE/gym class.  When Bobby sees Coach Lorri over the summer it means swimming at Krepps and Coach turns into a god in Bobby's eyes.

Bobby could hardly wait to get out of the car and bolted across the little bridge to get to the pool.  Boy, this sure beats staying in school this morning!!!!  Every time we go to the pool it takes Bobby a few minutes before he gets in, he has to mentally prepare to spend the next couple of hours in the water!!

Fun, Bobby trying to push Coach into the water.  Who is going to win this game??

 Love the look on Bobby's face as Coach is in the water!!

Our friend Andrew arrived.  Andrew is one of Coach's students too even though Bobby and Andrew go to different schools.

Andrew's in...

He somehow manages to jump in and not get his hair wet....that's true talent!!!

I just LOVE how swimming make kids truly happy!!!!  If anyone has some extra $$ laying around and would like to donate it to Mon. Co. schools to put in an indoor pool so that the kids can have adaptive swimming all year long, it would be really appreciated!!

Grandma Carolyn got in the pool to play too...

I got in for a couple of minutes too.  I have stayed in the water with Bobby every other time that we have gone swimming at Krepps, but Bobby didn't need me this time.

More tug of war with Coach....

 Bobby "wins" again....or, Coach jumped in!!

Andrew went over and jumped off of the diving board...

Bobby was swimming around in the water and stopped to watch Andrew...

Isabella then went and jumped too...

Bobby watched the two of them take turns jumping.  He even counted "1...2...3" out loud while Andrew was at the end of the board to help him jump.  Bobby played around in the deep water and got out jumped in, got out jumped in and he started swimming out a few strokes into the middle and then turn around and swim back to the side.

 So happy...

Bobby then did something pretty amazing, but I got ZERO pictures of this...boo :(

Bobby got out of the water, where a few of us were sitting pool side while he played.  He got out and ran to the other side of the pool.  He then jumped into the 5 ft. water by himself.  He then started swimming one of the lanes....floating, bobbing up and down, swimming.  Bobby made it to the rope that separates 5 ft. from 8 ft. and he went under the rope and swam clear to the ladder where he started.  Bobby swam the entire lap in water that is over his head ALL BY HIMSELF!!!!  No adults in the water with him!!!  Yay Bobby....you are a official swimmer!!!

He started across the pool where the lifeguard is and swam all the way to the ladder.  So proud!! He then turned around and swam off across the 12 ft. waters to diving board area...

Who is this super swimmer??!!!!  Whoo Hoo Bobby!!!

I had to take a picture of Bobby beside the number 12 to prove that he was in the 12' water!!  Then...

Bobby went over and stood by the diving board.  We all started yelling for him to jump off of the diving board.  Coach Lorri went over and gave her assistance...

 Look at that smile...he is happy to be out on the diving board!!

 He jumped!!!  OMG!!!  He jumped!!  The first time off of the diving board and there are no adults in the water to assist because he figured out how to truly swim!!!  AWESOME!!  Such a big boy!!

 Sorry that the pictures are blurry but I was too excited to keep the camera still.

The cheering section was yelling loudly!!!  Yay Bobby!!!

It wasn't a flook....he jumped again....

Yay Bobby!!  He's laughing out loud!!!

Coach, do I get extra credit in my PE grade for this??

Bobby only spent about 5 minutes of his hour and a half swimming time in the kiddie section.  He used to stay there almost the whole time and now he's a big boy and stays in the big pool!

It was finally time to go and get some lunch.  It was almost noon and Bobby was ready to eat.  Guess what Bobby wanted to do after we got home??  Swim!  He spent some time in our pool practicing his new trick....going under the water over and over.  Soon he will be able to swim under the water.

At the end of last summer, someone told me about a special needs swim time at Wave-tek pool in Fairmont.  I asked around to find out if they still do this and they do.  The Special Olympics of Marion Co. has the pool every Tuesday from 6:30-8.  Bobby was playing in our pool so nicely and we were all tired that we were thinking about not going.  Then Bobby says "ride in car" so we got him out of our pool and grabbed our things and Grandma Carolyn and I took Bobby to Wave-tek.

He has never been to a wave pool before and this was a new place, so it took him quite a few minutes before he actually got in the pool.  After he got used to his surroundings he went in and sat down by one of the fountains....

Then the waves started and Bobby LOVED them!!  He bobbed up and down in the deeper water and then he came to the low waters, sat down and let the water splash all over him...

This must be sensory heaven for him because he is LOVING this!!

Then the waves stopped and Bobby ventured back into the deep.

There was a huge difference in the way that the two pools were run.  All I'm really going to say about it is that Coach Lorri would have had a MUCH better handle on things.  I was thinking that I would probable take him every week, but we may go back once or twice, definitely not weekly.

Whoo Hoo, the waves are back...

They got everyone out of the pool at 7:30 and opened the water slide for 30 minutes.  All in all it was a GREAT time.  It makes me excited for the beach and I know that he is going to love the waves.  I hope that he wants to sit in the low waters of the ocean and let the waves lap over him.  I also know that he went right to sleep a little after 9 last night and had trouble getting up this morning at 7:30 to get ready for school.  I hope that he is not to bummed today that he has to complete a full day of school.