Going To The Mall

Now come on, is going to the mall really a blog worthy topic???!!!!  Well, in Bobby's case, it absolutely is blog worthy!!  Let me explain.....

I remember vividly a trip to the mall just a couple of years ago.  Bobby and I went to the mall with someone who is very close to us.  As we were trying to keep up with Bobby and trying to get him to listen to us and stay with us, which I was very used to, she finally said, "I'm not sure that my marriage would survive this."  It was a major eye opener for her what it can be like to go through day to day life with a child with autism.  Granted, not all children with autism are difficult to take out in public, but for us, going out with Bobby was a huge challenge.  We started talking...a nice, honest conversation.  It just really hit her over the head what our life was like.  She talked about what she and her husband do....they go shopping, go out to eat, etc....just like most everyone else. However, for my husband and me, we got a lot of take out and rented a lot of movies to live our life in the safety of our home where Bobby was safe and secure and we were all less stressed.

I thought that this life was our fate forever.....I was ok with that.  I didn't love it by any means, but what other choice did we have.  Bobby is our son and autism is in our life.  I really don't live my life anymore thinking about the future.  The autism lifestyle is more about living in the moment and just getting through the day, week, school year, etc.  So, I didn't really think about him maturing and I definitely never dreamed that he would progress as much as he has.

As we were walking out of the mall this afternoon and walking back to our car, it was a moment that caused me to stop and reflect on his progress.

After Bobby's ABA therapy session today, we drove to the mall because we had an hour to kill until we had to meet up with Daddy.  Bobby had been asking to go "ride the train" so it seemed like the perfect place to waste some time.  We parked and he walked independently into the mall and stood by my side at the ATM with only a verbal prompt to keep him by my side.  We walked over to the train and luckily there were two conductors there and Bobby got a ride.  The conductor told me that special needs kids get to ride for free, but you have to tell them because they hate to ask, especially for kids that don't have a visible disability.

After our ride we took our required walk to Sear's to make sure that the double doors into shipping are still there in the appliance department.  Good news....they were there!!  However, guess who we saw on our walk back from Sear's!!!!!  SANTA CLAUSE!!  Good thing that there was no one in line waiting to sit on the big guy's lap, because Bobby walked right in and stood beside him.  I jumped to grab him and realized that there was no one around so we stood and talked with Santa for a few minutes.  I explained that Bobby had autism and is a HUGE FAN, and told how Bobby likes to watch Christmas movies 24/7.  We didn't try for a picture, because Bobby wasn't really dressed in appropriate attire.  I did have him stand in front of the trees....

As we walked up the mall a little further, Bobby noticed the arcade.  He has never really paid attention to the arcade before so we walked in and he looked around at the games.

I prompted him to sit down in the car and drive....

He wasn't interested in actually playing the games, but enjoyed looking at all of the lights.  We then walked up to the food court and he stood in line at Chick Fil A with me and waited while I ordered his french fries.  He carried his own bag and drink over to a table and sat down and ate perfectly.

After we ate we went into JCPenny and then into Elder Beerman to look for a new pair a pajamas for pajama day at school this coming Friday.  He did perfectly in these two department stores.  As we were getting ready to leave we walked by the play place and he said "slide."  I don't let him play there because he is way too big, however I do make an exception to this rule during the mall's Sensitive Santa event for special needs kids.  I looked over and there were zero kids in there playing and he had been SOOOO very good and has had such a crazy few days that I broke my rule and let him go play.

He was in there playing for a minute and a half before two families came in with small children.  I said, "come on Bobby, it's time to go" and he got up and walked over to me, sat down and let me help him with his shoes and we left.  It's like he totally understood that he could only be in there when there were no little kids.  We walked out the door and to the car all without me holding his hand or holding on to him in any way.

We had a normal, mostly easy outing together at the mall.  Two years ago this wasn't even a possiblity in my mind......Can't wait to see what we can do as a family in the future!!

Medical "Spa" Day....Bobby's First Cast

When Bobby fell and hurt him self while roller skating, I immediately knew that there were going to be multiple medical appointments involved in this incident which filled me with more dread that I can even explain!!!  I was already feeling a little panicky because Bobby had a well-child check scheduled for first thing Monday morning.

Bobby's worst behaviors always shine through during medical appointments and he even actually does better at the dentist than at the doctor.  Go figure!  I don't take him to the doctor unless absolutely necessary.  The years of neurology visits and every 3 month doctors visits make me cringe when I think back on them.  I was so frustrated with Bobby by the time that the doctor actually made it into the exam room that I all wanted to do was leave and leave now!!  I rarely discussed in depth things with them because he was tantruming up a storm in the room with us, unless he was just too sick to make a fuss.  Many times Daddy came along and took Bobby to the car as soon as they finished their basic exam on Bobby just so that I could string two thoughts together to discuss with his physicians.

So imagine my panic when I knew that he had probably just broken a bone.  Ugh. When we first arrived at the Urgent Care immediately following the accident he was gearing up to show some super bad behavior....hitting the table, pacing and being extremely loud.  However, we knew he was in major pain.  As soon as his arm was stabilized, he calmed down and became pleasant for the rest of the medical visit.

So, I wasn't sure what to except this morning for his 8 am well-child check appointment.  What a way to start the day!!  To top it off it was cold, raining and just a blah gray outside.  Perfect!!  We got there 15 minutes early and went upstairs to Pediatrics.  What did my eyes see????  A completely empty waiting room, we were the first ones there....and the angels began to sing!!  We were checked in, Bobby ran around the brand new waiting room to inspect all of the new features and they took us back before anyone else got there!!!  In my head....."OH MY GOSH, we aren't going to have to wait for the doctor either!!  We are definitely first!!!"  We had to wait for the computers to boot up to get checked in is how I was confident that we were the only ones there!!

Our pediatrician came right in and obviously the well-child check went straight to.....what happened to your arm????

 I gave him our computer disk of x-rays and he left to give them a look.  Bobby admired himself in the mirror and did a little yoga on the exam table.

 Of course he had to ride around on the spinning chair for a while!

 The doctor came back in with a paper in his hand, he had gotten Bobby an appointment with the neighboring orthopaedic office (in the same building) for 2:30 so we would have to come back later on in the day.  I was just happy to have an appointment today so that I wouldn't have to worry about it for another day.  Bobby was being so incredible that I also got to discuss a couple of other concerns with him....a first!!  He did his basic exam, gave us our scripts for school and therapy, and we were on our way!!  I was so extremely happy with Bobby and so proud of his progress.

Now to the next part of our spa day.  I did something that I hadn't planned to do.  I got out Bobby's big Christmas gift, put it into a bag just in case we needed it at the appointment.  We got to the appointment 10 minutes early and when I walked around the corner and looked into the waiting room my heart sunk.  It was the exact opposite of the waiting room this morning.  It was PACKED.  I was soon thanking God that I grabbed his gift, a new iPad mini.  I had already set it up and it has all of his movies and tv shows loaded, plus earbuds work with the new one and don't with his old one.  I'm sure everyone would just love hearing Bobby play the same parts of movies over and over and over and over while they are waiting for their appointments.  Well, Bobby and I waited for 45 minutes before they took us back.  The iPad saved our lives!!!  When they finally took us back, we walked down the hallway and turned into a room and my heart sunk again......it's not a private room but curtained off areas.  What???  NO DOOR TO SHUT HIM IN WITH!!!

 I think he preferred this!!!  He can see what is going on....all of the hustle and bustle around him!!! He was happy and smiling.....on some kind of adventure.

 He even had time to ponder the meaning of life.......

 He had a lot of time to ponder.  Boy, did we do a lot of waiting!!!  They came in and talked to us and then left because they needed to go look at his x-rays that I brought.   Waited more....and more....

 Finally look his splint off and took us to x-ray so that they could get pictures of his elbow too.  We waited and he scratched and we waited and he scratched.  He was so happy to have that thing off of his arm.

 He complied very well in x-ray.  I had to hold his fingers and arms, but he let me and did a great job. Then we went back to our little curtain room and waited, and waited, and waited.......Finally the doctor came in, his elbow looks fine.  He has a buckle fracture in his wrist (according to the written report,.....There is a buckle fracture of the distal radius along the dorsal aspect. The remainder of the osseous structures are radiographically intact) so he only needs a short cast.  Yay, he will be able to bend his arm!!  Then we waited.....and waited.....and waited........until a man finally came in to put on a cast.  Whoo hoo!!  It's about time.

Again, Bobby shocked me and complied very well.  I had to assist and hold his arm certain ways while the cast was being put on.  But overall, Bobby did OUTSTANDING!!!  We were there for 2 1/2 hours and he did not cry, hit, whine, kick, yell.....he did laugh, smile, comply, and make his mom a very proud Mamma!!!  The iPad literally saved the day.  The thing about Bobby, I will be able to put it away and not bring it out again until......well, his next appointment in 4 weeks.  I do now have another thing that I want to get him for Christmas.....headphones, he doesn't really like the earbuds.  I also got to pick out the color for the cast because Bobby didn't answer when we asked him.  I picked red to go along with the Christmas festivities that will be coming up very soon.

So my baby has his first cast and he handled the whole thing so much better than I could have ever anticipated!!   So proud!!

Bobby's First Broken Bone

 Bobby has only been to a roller rink once before and it was actually this same rink.  However, he was in a stroller and I pushed him around the rink a couple of times in his stroller.  Today he was extremely excited when we walked into the building even though he had no idea where we were or what we were doing.  He was as happy running around the rink in his sock.  I went and got him a pair of skates and he wanted to put them on.....how do I know?  He sat right down and participated in the process of getting the skates on his feet.

He was NOT excited about the skates once he stood up on the wood floor.  But, he did like the carpeted area and he started walking around independently on his skates.  He was loving it!!!

 That is.....until he fell.  I didn't see him fall, but Daddy did.  Daddy said that he caught his hand on the wood trim at the bottom of this post that he is holding on to.

We knew that he was hurt immediately, and it didn't take long to know that he was really hurt.  He didn't stop crying and he has a super high tolerance for pain and he was holding and rubbing his arm. I called over one of our autism mom friends who happens to be a physical therapist and she too knew he was hurt even though she was hoping it was just sprained.  He sat down immediately and let me take his skates off of him and he was leaving with or without mom and dad!

We decided to come home and take him to the doctor in Morgantown (we were in Bridgeport).  But we couldn't stand to hear him in the car (in pain) and stopped at Med Express in Fairmont. Thankfully it wasn't busy.  Bobby stayed out in the car with Daddy while I went in and checked him in.  Daddy said that he was calmed down while waiting in the car. I went out and got them when I knew we were next.  Bobby waited in the waiting room well but was not happy when we went into the first room where they take your vitals.  We got back to an exam room and he was NOT happy.  Pacing, whining, crying, hitting the table......he just wanted to go home and he verbally told us this over and over!!!!! 

They were SUPER NICE and WONDERFUL to us.  The doctor ordered x-rays and asked us if we would like a larger exam room for Bobby to pace around in!!  Yes, we would!!  These pictures are from the larger room.  He finally got calmed down after we sang quite a few rounds of "Hush Little Baby,"  "Moon Moon Moon" from our beloved Laurie Berkner and watched some Pinky Dinky Doo on Mommy's phone.  

The x-ray process wasn't super easy but they were asking what they could do to make it the best for him.....which was so thoughtful.  I told them that I didn't know because we had never been in this position before and we will just have to see how it goes.  I was shocked that he complied and put his hand up on the table.  As soon as the got it in the right place the tech yelled "snap it" loud so that the doctor could take it quick.  Got 4 pictures super duper quick and got Bobby out of the x-ray room back to his exam room.  She came in with a black brace and the news that it is indeed broken.  He let her put on the brace to stablize the arm while she got the cast supplies.

He was like a new kid after the brace was put on.  It obviously took major pain away.  He was able to relax and Mommy and Daddy were able to breathe again.  They came back and put on a temporary cast and he did fairly well with that process too.  The hardest part was waiting with his arm up for 10 minutes while it dried.

We have a referral for an orthopedic doctor.  We also happen to have a well child check scheduled for Monday morning at 8.  We will hopefully have more info. on Monday!!

What a day!!!! 

Halloween 2014---Live Long And Prosper

Halloween is not my holiday.  We totally skipped it last year and I wasn't upset in the least. Staying home while other kids were out trick-or-treating did not bother me AT ALL!!  I have never been in to dressing up.  I'm the one ready for Halloween to end so that we can focus on Thanksgiving and Christmas, two holidays that I do not want to skip...ever!

I like to buy Bobby a Halloween shirt for school to wear on Halloween day, you know a bright orange shirt with a jack o' lantern face, that type of thing.  This year Bobby can wear man's size shirts so I googled "halloween shirt man" and got a whole range of things, which many were totally inappropriate.  I was scrolling down through some super hero shirts and got very excited when I came across a plain Star Trek t-shirt with nothing more than a little emblem on it...."OMG, this could actually be a costume" went through my head.  I just paired it with basic black (sweat)pants and he has a costume that to him is just like any other outfit that he wears on any other day.  However, to everyone else, he is a Star Trek crew member.  Perfect!!

A couple of weeks ago I tried it on him and just as I had suspected, he had ZERO issues with his Halloween costume.  Of course, I had to take a few pictures of him in costume.

OK, now that we have a costume for Halloween, what are we going to do with it??  The Halloween parade at school is in the afternoon after he has already left for the day because of his modified school day.  But this year the actual class party is scheduled before the parade.  I talked with his teacher and cancelled his therapy for after school and we decided that Bobby would stay for the party and the parade.  However, if he didn't want to participate (he lets us know in very obvious ways), I would just take him home.

I sent him to school already in "costume" so no one would have to change him.  Easy peasy, his first successful Halloween costume.  I offered to come in and take Bobby up to his regular ed classroom for the party since his autism teacher has another child in the classroom at the same time and I wasn't sure if she would be able to have just Bobby at this time.  When we (Daddy went too, he isn't going to miss any occasions in Bobby's life if he can help it!) got there, Ms. Kim was able to go with Bobby, so we followed them up to the 4th grade classroom.

Now he wasn't 100 percent excited about this, after all, every other day around this same time when Mommy walks into his classroom, it is time to leave for the day.  This time we are walking upstairs and totally changing his routine.

He sat down in his seat and waited for the party to begin.  Thankfully there was popcorn in the treat bags so he had a Bobby approved treat to eat at the party.  We dumped the rest of his snacks out and dumped the popcorn into the bag and Bobby partied on.

I took a few more pictures of all of the kids and Daddy and I took off to go get some good seats in the gym for the costume parade.  Now the stress for me began.....worrying how Bobby would do in the costume parade!!  Bobby didn't participate last year, I picked him up like every other day and he kept his normal day.  The year before Bobby did participate in the costume parade....he sat down on the floor half way around the first lap (each class makes 2 laps around the gym) and refused to get up, all while Ms. Kim was trying to get him up and out of the gym.  It was super hard to watch.  I just wanted to earth to open up and suck Bobby and me in.

 I couldn't get enough pictures of the first lap around the gym!!!

 He was walking perfectly with Ms. Kim right by his side!!

 Daddy and I wanted so badly to jump up and yell for him, to let him know we were there watching and how proud we were of him.....but we sat quietly in our seats just in case it would disrupt him in any way.

As he finished his first lap, I just totally welled up with tears.  Daddy looked over at me and couldn't believe it, "are you crying???"  I couldn't help it.  Yes, I was crying.  He did it, he walked his two laps around the gym with his class.  It is not a big thing at all, yet it is a huge thing.  It is one of those small, simple things that is a culmination of all of the hard work that he has been doing to get him to be able to walk along side of typical peers in a world that is not necessarily easy for those on the autism spectrum.  Whoo hoo Bobby!!  Mommy and Daddy are super proud.

Part two of our Halloween is generally trick or treating at Grandma's house.  We did go to Grandma's house, but it was raining so we passed on trick or treating and hung out on her front porch and watched the trick or treaters come to us.

I know that he likes hanging out on Grandma's porch on Halloween because he looks at old pictures of this activity on his iPad all of the time.  For some crazy reason, these are some of his favorite pictures that he looks at often.

 Did I mention that it was cold?  No coat for Bobby is getting to be the theme of our lives.  But poor Grandma had to wrap up in a blanket.

 Trick or treat was finally over and we were all freezing.  Time to come inside and warm up.  Yes, Daddy is a Star Trek Science Officer in his blue shirt!  Bobby is a Captain in his yellow shirt.  I honestly didn't know this information until Daddy clued me in!!!  Live long and prosper!!

 Daddy performing a Vulcan Mind Meld on Bobby (who is laughing like a crazy man!!).

 Bobby was tired after this super long, fun filled day and wanted Grandma to put him to bed (and sing Hush Little Baby to him).

Grandma got Bobby this super cute sign for a Halloween gift (the picture on the sign is of the actual train that Bobby rode a few weeks ago).

This day had an even more perfect ending.  When we got back home at 8:30, Bobby went right upstairs and got in bed and was asleep by 9:00 and didn't wake up until 7 this morning.   Ahhhh, a perfect Halloween!!!